On Building Stronger Family Ties:
We all wanted a family embracing the spirit of unity and love. Even though it is already a part of a journey we take on a daily basis, it takes a constant decision to devote yourself towards serving and yearning to improve the relationship for your family’s welfare. We could never be perfect in our roles, but at least we always try to give our best.
Negotiating Household Chores in the Family
The words family and parenting are synonymous with the word negotiation. Every family has to figure out how to live together and manage their kids and sometimes that comes to negotiating and compromising on how you do things together. A lot of arguments families can have, especially during the early stages of living together and starting a family are surrounded around how to run the household and how chores should be done.
The thing about building a family is that sometimes, you really have to compromise.
Because chores can be a big source of headache between parents, it may be worth the time for both of you to sit down and really figure the best way to conquer chores together.
1) Have an Open Communication about Expectations
A healthy relationship takes communication; this is no different when it comes to chores. Have a frank conversation about what your expectations are, and listen to your spouse about what his/her expectations are when it comes to chores.
2) Create a List You Both Agree With
If you’re lucky, your spouse won’t mind doing all the chores you hate and vice versa. Creating a list of who is expected to do what chores and how often helps stop the argument about who was supposed to wipe down the countertops after dinner. If your kids can already manage to help with the chores, make sure you have equally designated them their task according to their capabilities.
3) Understand You May Have to Compromise
The thing about building a family is that sometimes, you really have to compromise. You might like things a bit cleaner than your spouse, but part of negotiating chores is to understand that if you want someone else to help you out with the bulk of the work, you may have to be ok with the house only getting dusted biweekly instead of weekly like you prefer. Trying to find the balance between both your working styles can be tough, but it is one you can figure out together if you’re willing to work on it.
4) Cleaning Styles May Be Different
When two people get married, they both come from different backgrounds and experiences. This is true even when it comes to cleaning styles. You might have had a list of chores you were supposed to accomplish as a kid without directions. However, your spouse’s family might of chosen to have a big cleaning day once a week where everyone cleaned for a few hours to get all the work done. Because you’re styles might be different, you may have to talk to your spouse about how you both work best when it comes to accomplishing chores and how you both can work together to get the house clean.
5) Let Each Family Member Do the Chores Their Way
Ok? I know that sounds like it’s going to be unmanageable, but as long each family members are doing their chores the right way with no bugging speeches from anybody is surely a good thing. Since you’ve made the list, had the conversation and completely understand how each person likes to work. Now it’s time for you both to do what you agreed to do. That means that you have to let your each family members actually do the chores that he/she agreed to without input from you. If you want to have a household where everyone in the family helps clean, this is so important, especially in handling your kids. Never point out what they did wrong while doing their chores before they’ve even completed the task.